(sleeping with a waste-of-calories
with no sex appeal. her heart
the volume of
smell increases as it's
getting hotter than a
I don't mind her
cold hands around my --
burned out lights form a
silhouette; film this on
screen like a dream
you can watch or hear.
but she doesn't scream;
her bones suffocate me
as she's wrapped around
my body -
she's stiff, cold, dry.
sleeping with a waste-of-calories
with no sex appeal. her heart
doesn't beat. )
Until I can't breathe.
Edit: First ever DLD! Thank you all for your support.
Edit: Wow, first ever Daily Deviation... Thank you so much for ~panicphotoofyou & ^NicSwaner for featuring my piece. You both made my day! Wow, this is unbelievable...
(took off mature content warning...not sure if it needs it? If it does then tell me and I'll put it back)
Be sure to check out the other artists featured and show your support by ing the News Article. Keep writing and keep creating.
Then each line dragged me further into this trance as I kept reading. I think you really should have more confidence in this piece: It's written in such a fresh, engaging way! I definitely enjoyed the read! I'm sorry my comments always seem to be inadequate, but I really do love all of your pieces!
My favorite line was: "sleeping with a waste-of-calories." just genius!
( I wouldn't worry about the mature content. It definitely seems tame enough that I don't think it needs a warning. also, I'm so glad you got a DD. I'll keep an eye open for other pieces of yours )
Your comments are never inadequate! They always mean so much to me - don't worry about that. I feel like my replies are inadequate, haha.
Thank you a ton for the compliments and favorite on this and everything. I'm so glad you really liked this piece.
( I'm glad it doesn't need it - I didn't really think it did although it's suggestive, but it's so ambigious that I didn't think it would matter. Thank you so much, again! D'aww, you. Well, I'll be doing the same. )
You're most welcome! As I said: I enjoy your pieces. Commenting and such is the least I can do to show my love and support!
(If you get me before I get you, you really are going to die
Well it's a race then! Ready, set, go!
but we still have 4 months for you, and 6 for me I wonder if I'm going to win?)
Well, thank you so much again!
Races! Woo! I usually lose in them.
Hmm, I dunno! )
i really like the use of "sleeping with a waste-of-calories", i know it's my own perception making it this way but it makes it feel even sadder to me-- like a cheap girl with an eating problem. all around, this is beautiful, and your unique phrasing and thought process make this exquisite
Huh, I never looked at it that way! That's for the additional insight on my piece and thank you so much for the lovely compliments!
i sounded rude
and i feel the same about my own, haha. DDs are not a prize so much as a recognition of skill; it is dA's way of telling all the other deviants you are a talented artist.
- Congrats on the well deserved DD!
Have a nice day!
think that all sex is as filthy and empty as this.
Interesting and I can see why you think so!